Keegan Lenker's Musings....

Youth Ministry and Your Family

Doing youth ministry is one of the greatest callings in the world. With that calling must come extreme discipline and sacrifice. To be in youth ministry and not be balanced is to place significant risks in many other areas of your life, especially with your family. 

My first day as a youth pastor on my own following an internship in June 2002 is quite vivid in my memory. I spent the day setting up my office and upon completion of that propped my feet up on my desk and and said, "What do I do now?" I've been behind ever since. 

In doing youth ministry all these years, there's a few things I've come to learn that I'd like to remind my fellow youth workers who have been doing this awhile and for those new to the profession to be aware of:

The last time I looked at my contract it stated that I'm paid for 40 hours per week. Anyone in ministry knows there's an "ish" that follows those hours. We all know that ministry is a demanding job and quite honestly it usually means more than 40 hours per week. My first two years in any position I logged every hour I worked to show how many hours I averaged a week and to put any doubters of "you're never here" to rest.

On slower weeks for me it may mean I put in 35 hours. During most weeks I'm usually in the 40-50 hour range and in the summertime, it can be well into the 70-80 hour week depending on what is going on in our ministry. 

To stay close to the 40 hour week I have had to work really hard at my time in the office and to be efficient while I am there. I get into the occasional conversation that is distracting and can use the excuse of being on facebook too long as "ministry," but I work hard to be productive while I am in the office. 

Little to never do I take my work home. You'll always be behind in ministry and when I get home, my family is the priority. Yes there are times students need us or an emergency comes up, but for most of us that is seldom and when I am home, it's to focus on my family. Let me remind us, family should be our priority. 

I know too many people that have "successful" ministries and everyone in the church loves them, but their own children despise them because they are never home and working too much. Their marriages are masked brokenness. Can we call ourselves successful if we're losing our families for the sake of a successful ministry? 

If we don't care to be present with our families we're limiting our ability to be successful in other areas of our lives. 

Lastly, date your spouse. This has become so hard for us since we've had kids and the demands of ministry have increased, but dating your spouse should never be trumped by an some other event the church deems as more important. We've got to be flexible at times, but we have to renegotiate that time with our spouses. 

The moment your kids say that your job is more important than they are is the moment you need to do an immediate priority shift in your life. 

We need you for the long haul in youth ministry and these are just a few things to ponder for me today and to be reminded of. 

I'm off to my sons baseball practice now.   

You're loved.

Special Needs and Youth Ministry

One of my favorite things about working here at PazNaz is the fact we have a Special Needs Pastor here on staff. Her sole job is to help create a ministry for families with special needs and provide a space where these students are a part of the Body of Christ. She even has a class designed specifically for people that have special needs within our community. I'll be honest, it's one of the ministries I brag about most because it makes such a statement about the inclusion of ALL people. While it's something many of us verbalize, it's the actions that help speak validity into it. 

A big reason a lot of new people attend here is that we have a space for families with kids that have special needs. For some it's such a gift that they can come to worship with the rest of the Body of Christ and feel comfortable there are trained people walking alongside their kids. Yet that has implications for me as a pastor in student ministries.

Because we have a special needs ministry here it means we may have a few more students with special needs that are a part of our youth ministry. Allow me to be confessional for a moment and admit this isn't easy for me. I (like many of you) may just tend to shy away at times from people with special needs out of fear. For me that fear lies in my lack of understanding or education of the person that has a special need. What we don't know we tend to avoid. 

Within our ministry we have students that carry all types of special needs. For many they have a volunteer shadow that walks alongside them through their experience. We have a point person on our youth staff that is aware of most of these students and makes a point to see that each student has a healthy experience within our ministry while they attend. 

No student there has the same condition. Each is a unique person and each deserves the space offered to them alongside their peers. Here's a few things I feel our students have learned in the last few years. 

Each year in October we take an emphasis on a Sunday to highlight our special needs ministry and each department and class has someone that is either a part of the ministry or volunteers to share his/her story of the impact special needs is having in the lives of our students. 

We had one student who is high functioning autism share what the world looks like through his eyes. As he shared his story it was obvious that the students were trying to understand him well. I'll never forget the moment he said, "Just because I talk slower doesn't mean the person behind the voice is invaluable. Come talk to me." We could have closed in prayer right there. Offering the space for students to listen well creates greater understanding for everyone. 

A few weeks ago another one our students with autism was leaving early and in the middle of the teaching expressed he was leaving because he was being baptized that day. The youth room erupted in applause for him and in that moment he was validated as "one of us." In church that day the youth section went crazy after his baptism declaring to the rest of the body present that he is one of us. 

Our adult special needs class recently went to serve at our weekly Church in the Park where 200 homeless are fed. One of the adults was expressing what he learned that day in his experience. While he shared, there was no declaration of his own special need as he expressed the fact the homeless needed loved and fed. 

Out of this we have students that regularly volunteer to shadow these students because they recognize the importance of ALL as a part of the Body of Christ. 

This year in an effort to move closer to them, I'm working alongside our special needs pastor to ask her to help educate me on each particular individual and their need so we can have greater understanding as a volunteer staff of the value of ALL within our student ministry. 

Last weekend we attended a Jr. High Event and one of our special needs students attended. It was amazing to see her reckless abandon to love Jesus openly and express that with other students her age. In fact, that reckless abandon is a model to those that watch her passion for Jesus. Nothing would stop her. There's a great lesson for all of us there.

They continue to teach me regularly. For me to be a pastor to students means I reach out in all ways to uphold the calling placed on my life to see humanity expressed in ways we may be unfamiliar with. It's a part of that calling. The moment we avoid educating ourselves on particular students is the moment we dismiss the very people Jesus died for.

I've sure got a lot learn as I move and grow, but one thing is sure, our special needs students are a gift to youth ministry. Hope they are in your ministry as well. 

If you are ever in the neighborhood in Pasadena, swing by around 5pm on Saturdays and watch our special needs wheelchair bound students play basketball. You'll be changed forever.

You're loved.